boy oh boy do I need this! haha what life would be like if I can get all the assholes in one place and actually speak the truth about things. it is so many unsaid things floating around this family is unreal. and it make me think am I the only one who hear and see what I see or every one hearing and seeing the same thing but know one speaks of it….. the way I get about my family a person will say that is literally the only thing that she talk about. so sad they are the only people who hurt me. and god forbid anyone tells anyone unsaid thoughts or god forbid we all be in the same area to compare stories.
one thing I learned about my father is..he dont like for us not to be close …me and my siblings… I never understood why until we actually got the balls and started to talk about him. come find out he tell one person one story and the other child another. now them two have bad crazy thoughts about each other and dont even want to be around each other…he gets them all to his self to tell all the lies to.
I think its so fucked up!…..one sibling come to me saying yeah dad told me this about u but I never wanted to ask… wtf… complete lies and bullshit is what keeps us from getting to know one another .. its so sad. I carry so much …and im glad I have someone to speak about it all to. it helps me slowly heal and not have so much anger . I talk about it so much because it truly pisses me off and hurts at the same time. to know all u did was truly try to fit into a family u were literally just thrown into. I tried to make them see me..didnt work..hear me listen ..didnt work. I feel like im not important.. that all that i feel is not real to these people. I told my dad I have anxiety… the man said its bullshit ..its something I made up to get attention!!! I mean … its so sad… its not in his bone to hear me… he won’t believe anything I say until the day he die and when he do… I will visit his grave and tell all my truth. and then he can’t tell me its not real or didnt happen!.but the funny thing is when someone else say it… as my sister is saying now…I bet he know its real now… you know what bothers me … all my sibling just listen to the shit that come out his mouth …I dont think no one ever defends me. tell him I didnt do something. or maybe she do dad..or let her be…type shit… to me it seems like they all Justen listen and take in the information and try to figure out if its true or not…. shit crazy…smh